Romney Veep Sweepstakes

Mitt Romney is close to selecting a running mate, so I think it’s high time for some irresponsible predictions. Let’s break it down completely unscientific-style: the potential Republican VP candidates and the totally made-up odds that they’ll be picked by the Romney campaign:

Condoleezza Rice – Bless her heart; she seems like a good, competent person with all the integrity you want in your elected officials. But she carries the mixed baggage of the Bush years, and she may be the only person in the list who’s to the left of Romney, whose left flank is prominent enough already, thank you. Odds: 50 to 1

Chris Christie – In spite of being a fairly liberal Republican, he’s popular even among conservatives for his economic policies and for responding so forcefully to stupid questions. It’d be fun to watch him pants Biden in a debate, but lingering reservations from the Tea Party wing would make him a risky pick. Odds: 20 to 1

Tim Pawlenty – Popular former governor of a swing state, he bailed out of the 2012 presidential race extremely early (making even John Huntsman look like he had staying power), citing his wife’s apprehensions about campaigning as a reason. It would be kind of weird to jump right back on the campaign trail. Odds: 8 to 1

Paul Ryan – A good pick, popular with the Tea Party, but can do so much more good in the Senate House than as VP. Odds: 8 to 1

Rob Portman – Who? Exactly. Odds: 3 to 1

Marco Rubio – Popular, and pushes down the whiteness factor of the ticket a couple notches. But not as much experience as you’d like to see from someone whose main job is to get in the VP debate and treat Joe Biden like a baby treats a diaper. Also, does Mitt Romney want a running mate with nicer hair than him? Odds: 15 to 1

Rand Paul – Wait, my precious, just wait. Odds: 100 to 1

Somebody else – Romney seems like the predictable sort, so I’d be surprised if it was a name that hasn’t already been mentioned. But as always, I’ve got my fingers crossed for an Ann Coulter or Ted Nugent. Odds: 50 to 1

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