The Comic Book Force Field Theory of the Trump Presidency

Comic books take place in a world that’s like our own, but with some key, crucial differences. It’s a world that has science and technology, but it’s different from from the science and technology that we know. For instance, it’s a world where the phrase “radioactive spider” makes perfect sense. Where you can apparently buy a miniaturized nuclear reactor at More …

The Failure of Obamacare, the Failure of Obamacare Repeal, and the Coming Kid Rock Presidency

The Trump presidency hasn’t really changed much about Washington. What it has done is unmask and throw into sharp relief the sad state of felonious crapitude the place was already in. The people that are going most out of their minds over Trump are the people who most desperately want to keep things going the way they have been. To More …

Fixing Health Insurance in One Blog Post

As the Congressional Republicans continue to treat health insurance law the way a monkey treats a typewriter, one of the stories we keep hearing is how so very hard this process is. Healthcare regulation is hard and heath insurance is complicated and, man, unwinding this Obamacare thing is so difficult that we just don’t know if we’ll be able to More …

News Commentary from a Guy Who’s Just Barely Paying Attention – Obamacare Repeal Fail

The story of this past week has been the failure of the Republicans in Congress to pass the American Health Care Act, otherwise known as the Obamacare “repeal and replace” bill. Mainstream media outlets varied in their description of the severity of this failure, from “career-ending debacle for Paul Ryan” to “cataclysmic event the earth has not seen since a More …

The Realest Realist

“First thing’s first, I’m the realest.”
— Early 21st century poet and philosopher Iggy Azalea

A while back, I was having a discussion with my spiritual adviser and brother-in-law Jeremy about the similarities between the Christian church and Apple Computers. More …

The Dumbest Thing I’ll Do Today – Asking the DeVos Question

Ever since I was a little boy, I’ve always said, “Never get involved in an argument on Facebook.” Actually, what I said when I was a little boy was, “Never drop a frog down the pants of the town crier,” but the principle is the same. So, I feel like this is a mistake before I do it. But, so More …

You Have Won Nothing; You Have Lost Nothing

Once upon a time, the Christian church dominated the culture in America. People who really didn’t care one way or the other said they were Christians by default. Our art, literature, and conversations were shot through with Christian references and symbolism. When you spoke of the widow’s mite or the battle of Jericho, you could be pretty sure that everybody knew More …

Former Owner of USFL’s New Jersey Generals Gains Access to Nuclear Launch Codes

What just happened? I could not be more amazed if I had turned on the news and seen Bigfoot walk out of the woods and give a press conference where he announced that he was opening a chain of hair salons called “Sassyquatch.” I haven’t been this wrong about anything since that time I let Anthony Weiner borrow my cell phone. More …

A Further Explanation

I recently wrote a post that attempted to demonstrate the awesome scope of the brokenness of our current system. Long story short, I said that, in spite of historic electoral gains at every level of government, if conservatives don’t control the presidency, and therefore the supreme court, then conservatism is doomed. A friend of mine then asked, “Hey genius, if More …

Wherein I Renounce Conservatism

People don’t vote for ideologies. Regular people, I mean. Voting for something just because it’s the most accurate reflection of some “-ism” is something you’d expect from either a college sophomore or some dead-ender who has political newsletters instead of friends and always ends up in line behind me at Starbucks. Normal people vote based on what works for them. Ideologies are More …

Don’t Give Up on Us, Baby

This election, if it hasn’t brought out the worst in us, has brought out the worst in our opinions of other people. Suspicion of the government — an American tradition and, I believe, a prime indicator of a healthy society — has devolved into suspicion of and contempt for our fellow citizens — a prime indicator that you’re in the next-to-the-last More …

A Clarification of Our Current Predicament

There are more than a few smart, respectable, level-headed conservatives saying that we have to vote for Trump because that’s the only way to keep the Supreme Court out of Hillary’s hands. It’s an inversion of the “devil you know” argument: the devil we know is the most horrible thing imaginable, so anything else must be better. It’s a compelling argument, for More …

Trump VP Suggestions

As I mentioned before, since I don’t have anyone to vote for, I’m only following the 2016 presidential election for it’s entertainment value. With that in mind, I’d like to see Trump pick the most entertaining vice presidential running mate possible. Here are my suggestions, along with their equivalent entertainment value. 1. Bernie Sanders Would this not be hilarious? The More …

Welp, We’re Truly Screwed Now: A Very Early Pre-Post-Mortem

After Donald Trump’s big win in Indiana the head of the Republican party says that he is now the party’s presumptive nominee for president, and I have never felt more like I am taking crazy pills. So, it’s time to start accepting some unpleasant facts. The most likely outcome of all this is that Hillary Clinton will be the next More …

An Attempt to Explain the Current Madness

As I mentioned previously, I’m trying to stay away from politics for the sake of my mental and intestinal health. I’m having limited success, because it’s not like trying to keep from rubbernecking at a car crash; it’s like trying to keep from rubbernecking as the Hindenburg plows into a football stadium full of Elvis impersonators driving monster trucks through live electrical More …

Ok, I (Sort of) Give Up

I read a lot about news and politics, probably way too much. Because there are diminishing returns that go along with being aware of problems that you can’t do anything about. It’s good to know that problems exist, in general, because it helps you to grasp what kind of world you’re living in. It helps you to understand reality. And when repercussions More …

What’s Going On

If you’re looking around at world events and starting to think that maybe you’re the crazy one, here’s something to make you feel a little less insane: this article from The Federalist by Stella Morabito is the clearest explanation I’ve yet seen for what’s currently happening to American politics and culture. If you don’t have time to read it, I can sum More …

Let’s Learn About Evolution!

Looks like from now through the 2016 elections, the default question for idiot reporters who want to want to play “Gotcha!” with Republican candidates is going to be something like, “Blah blah blah EVOLUTION! Huh?! What do you say about that, huh?!?!” Never mind that most reporters couldn’t define the word “evolution” if you put a gun to their heads. Those who More …

Thoughts on Tourture

With the release of the CIA torture report, I thought I would write a little about my thoughts on torture, but then I remembered that I already did. Below is the entirety of a post from 2009, another time when a lot of people were thinking about the moral implications of “enhanced interrogation”: There’s been a lot of talk about More …

What Saturday Night Live Would Look Like in an Alternate Universe

Holy cow, a Saturday Night Live sketch where they kind of sort of criticize President Obama. How did this make the show? I’m sure heads will roll.